universal antagonist 👑🌹 @breeoche@shrike.club

second favourite feature of french is how any adjective can be made into an insult by adding in the definite article

favourite feature of french nobody talks about is definitely how any noun can be made into an insult by removing the definite article

legit did not realise why people were looking at me like that until the pharmacist nervously asked me "so, uh, that bag? what are those for?" while checking to see if they had my T in stock (and for once they actually did)

*guy visibly holding a bag full of dead mice* why are people on this bus looking at me weird

ME: thats not what i meant when i told you you needed to get some sun
ELUSIVE: what do you mean? im getting suns *points at screen* look ive got 13

i told elusive living the past week in the dark was probably causing her depression due to lack of vitamin D and she started playing mario sunshine

MORE ONONOKI LET'S FUCKING GO

if youre jewish drink some water now

what do you mean i will end up with arthritis in all my fingers by the time im 40 constantly playing cat's cradle is a completely reasonable stim

who needs video games i've got a length of string and a dream

Went to see Rocky Horror with our dad as is basically tradition when he's in Paris, except this time we saw the stage play! We got our seats randomly upgraded for free and the actors all killed it so today was very good.

Just had to be the dykiest guy on the Champs Élysées today.

my curse is i am constantly thinking of french-english bilingual jokes and literally why would anyone choose to be french-english bilingual

the queer leaving my body when i turn 67 sorry this was also funnier in my head

do NOT claim to be french + gay if youre not diagnosed with at least one pd sorry this was funnier in my head

fai7h: closing commissions 8efore the end of the month for the first time... ever! they might come 8ack on if i finish this 8ig one 8efore april 8ut man this feels good

*guy whos been working nonstop voice* why am i tired i havent done anything