roasting my girlfriend by pointing out that she, a porcupine, has to slurp grains off the cold concrete floor while i get to wander around freely eating stalks of celery out of children's hands and getting into circumstances
i stretched and made a weird noise and she was like "you okay?" and i proceeded bleat derisively until my handlers shot me with a tranq dart and put pool noodles on my horns
@sarahzedig you're just baaing questions!
@sarahzedig so sad to hear you're baa'ing silenced like this
@sarahzedig it's freedom of speech not freedom of biting my fingers
@eevee MASTICATIVE VIOLENCE IS A FORM OF SPEECH AND I WILL BE TAKING THIS TO THE SUPREME COURT
@sarahzedig STANDING ON A WOODEN CRATE AND BLEATING IS NOT THE SUPREME COURT ARF ARF ARF ARF ARF ARF ARF
@eevee YOU ARE IN CONTEMPT OF PETTING ZOO COURT BAA BAA BAA BAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA https://youtu.be/nlYlNF30bVg?t=81
@eevee
🦊 🤝 🐐
[adorable incoherent noises]
@sarahzedig the pool noodles on the horns are the goat version of being wheeled into court on a dolly in a straitjacket
the bozos who run this petting zoo don't give a shit about freedom of speech