sarah zedig! 🍉🐐 @sarahzedig@shrike.club

lmao look at THIS pack of peanuts. those ones in the front with the shapes cut into them, that's called a cucoloris. like a cuckoo, or a cookie cutter (both are cited). i didn't actually know this term until just now, because i only ever knew them as a branchaloris-- where instead of making a cutout you'd just go find a branch covered in leaves, stick it on a c-stand, and blow a fan into it to create leaf shadow. actually got a picture of one from one of my sets here...

maybe i just miss the simple physical fulfillment of working with my hands

i miss film work a lot. it's a job i'm good at, a job i enjoy, a job that i genuinely found fulfilling in a way no other job ever was. but it left no room for other interests. no room for video work, for writing, even for a social life outside the crew of whatever your current gig is. the industry is full of predators and jackasses, it's exceedingly rare for you to work a gig you actually care about in any meaningful sense, it's just a lot of STRESS.

but i miss it anyway. i dunno

sometimes i think about investigating the indie film scene here in seattle. would anyone get some use out of a former G&E swing who hasn't worked on a set in six years? would i be too old and weird and slow to fall in with the college crowd? too out of experience to fall in with the professional set? do i even WANT to go back to film production? 12 hour days of intensely demanding physical labor 5-6 days a week for months on end. if it's what you do it's all you do, no room for casuals. sigh

must admit i really miss having access to my university's student film production club equipment. i was such friends with the professors in my dept that even after graduation they let me check stuff out. not that i ever took them up on it unless someone *else* was making a movie. SIGH

not a bad price for such a versatile kit but definitely too pricey for my purposes. maybe if i reach a point where i'm actually making something that might be considered Films

unfortunately just one black flag (realistically the kit i'd get the most use out of) is like $50, so i'll be keeping to the industrious grip's solution of duvetyne, coat hangers, and binder clips. all i really need for shooting indoors anyway

sometime this year i'm gonna invest in a c-stand and a pair of LED panels with barn doors, and then it's over for you bitches.

wait shit how much does a pack of flags and scrims cost???

i probably should have gotten a plate with a 90* bend since this horizontal orientation will make things complicated if/when i want to use this for directional light? but the nice thing is these plates are all standardized sizes so if this one turns out untenable in that respect i can drop $15 on the bendy plate and swap it into place. can't go wrong with two beaver boards tbh

[sighs mournfully] i should probably do a video about this movie

cate blanchett's scenes are legendary for a reason, but this one in particular sticks with me because my relationship to it has changed so much over the years. i remember watching this in 2009 and loving jude quinn's *vibe* but mostly thinking he was talking nonsense. completely impenetrable to me.

now i watch this scene, having endured EXTREMELY minor fame and more than a few fandom incidents myself, and all jude's lines make perfect sense, they resonate personally

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iX5_-FORI1I

i'm not there has a reputation for being difficult to parse if you don't know anything about the history of folk music and bob dylan, but i've never really understood that? there's certainly images and scenes whose significance might be lost on you, but what makes i'm not there Art is that it makes bob dylan an art object, uses him as a lens to examine public and private identity, the effects of making political art on the artist, the effects of fan obsession, of blindly worshipping the past

NOW we're putting out fires with gasoline

maybe i'll inflict this movie on whoever attends my birthday party, since that's the only way i'll ever be able to get anyone to watch it

he literally regenerates

the experimental bob dylan biopic i'm not there is a bottle season of doctor who

i'm not there is such a good movie